The Pattern Breaking Sessions

You understand WHY you do it.

Let's work with the part of you that still reacts.

DOES THIS FEEL FAMILIAR?

You understand the pattern.

So why does it keep happening?

✓ You know why you people-please, overthink or shut down—but knowing where it came from hasn't stopped you from doing it.

✓ You can tell yourself you're allowed to say no, but the second someone is disappointed with you, the guilt and anxiety kick in anyway.

✓ You know you aren't responsible for everyone else's feelings, but your body still reacts like it's your job to fix things, smooth things over or make everything okay.

✓ You've gotten really good at understanding your childhood, but you're starting to realize that understanding the pattern and actually changing your response to it are two different things.

✓ And sometimes you wonder which parts are actually YOU—and which parts you learned to become because they kept you connected, accepted or safe growing up.

This is the part no one explained to me...

You understand the pattern. Your body still reacts.

You can know you're allowed to have boundaries and still feel guilty after setting one.

You can know someone's anger isn't yours to fix and still feel yourself scrambling to make it better.

You can know you're safe and still freeze when someone's tone changes.

Because some of these patterns weren't things you consciously chose.

They were things you learned to do before you were old enough to realize you were learning them.

And eventually, they can start feeling like who you are.

These Sessions have given me boost of confidence, compared to the hundreds of other resources I've used in the past 10+ years. This is the closest I've come to fully understanding my trauma.

SHERYL D.

But who are you without your patterns?

That's the question behind

The Pattern Sessions....

Instead of spending more time analyzing what happened…
(let’s be real, you’ve already done that.)

We’ll figure out:

What pattern is still running.
What your system learned to expect.
What keeps pulling you back into the same response.

Then we work with the emotional, belief + nervous system pieces underneath it—

so you can start responding from who you are now, instead of who you had to be then.

WHAT WE EXPLORE IN YOUR SESSIONS

Your CoreWounds

You already know what happened...

Let’s look at what it taught you to believe about yourself.

Maybe you grew up learning that love, connection, or belonging would disappear when you:

• disappointed someone
• had needs of your own
• said no or changed your mind
• stopped taking care of everyone else
• became “too much” or not enough of what they wanted
• told the truth about what was happening

So you adapted.

You became the good daughter. The peacekeeper. The responsible one. The easy one. The one who could handle everything.

You played the role...

And it helped you survive your childhood.

But they can quietly become the rules you still live by as an adult.

You say no — then spend hours wondering if you did something wrong.

Someone's tone changes — and suddenly you're explaining yourself.

Someone is upset with you — and you can't relax until you fix it.

You need support — but it somehow feels safer to do everything yourself.

You know logically you're allowed to have boundaries — but your body reacts like they could cost you the relationship.

WHAT IS THE CORE WOUND UNDER THE PATTERN?

This is the part we work with.

In our sessions, we identify the core wound underneath the pattern—the younger part of you that first learned:

“I have to keep people happy to stay connected.”
“My needs create problems.”
“If someone is upset with me, I need to fix it.”
“I have to earn love by being useful.”
“Being myself could cost me belonging.”

Because understanding where a pattern came from is important.

But understanding it isn't the same as no longer living by it.

Together, we work with the emotional, belief + nervous-system pieces that are still responding as though those old rules apply—so you can begin making choices based on who you are now, instead of what you had to become then.

CHILDHOOD TRAUMA ISN'T A LIFE SENTENCE

You don't need more insight…

You need a way to change what keeps happening.

✓ We figure out the pattern that's still running.
The guilt after saying no. The panic when someone's upset. The overexplaining. The shutdown. The need to fix everything before you can relax.

✓ We work with what your body learned to expect.
Because you can know you're safe and still feel the tight chest, racing thoughts, dread or urge to make everything okay.

✓ We build a different response.
You'll leave with practical ways to work with triggers, boundaries, relationships and the moments you normally lose yourself in.

✓ And we work at your pace.
You don't need your entire childhood figured out before you come in. We start with what's affecting your life now.

Nervous System

So a look, text, tone of voice or difficult conversation doesn't automatically send you into panic, freeze, fawn or hours of overthinking.

The patterns

We identify what happens between trigger → reaction → regret and build another option so you're not just understanding your patterns—you're changing them.

Your relationships + boundaries

We work on the real-life stuff: saying no, tolerating someone's disappointment, asking for what you need, having hard conversations and knowing when something isn't healthy.

The beliefs under it

The old conclusions like I'm selfish, I'm difficult, I'm too much, I have to keep everyone happy, I'm responsible for how they feel.

A HOLISTIC APPROACH

You learned how to survive on more than one level.

So that's how we'll work with it.

Your childhood didn't only influence what you think.

It shaped what you believe, what your body expects, how you respond to conflict, what you tolerate in relationships and who you learned you had to be to stay connected.

That's why our work can include all of it:

Nervous system + emotions + beliefs + boundaries + relationships + the patterns playing out in your actual life.

Because knowing where the pattern came from isn't the same as being free from it.

Meet
Aspen

SOMATIC (SEP) & TRAUMA INFORMED COACH

I didn't find this work because I wanted a new career. I found it because I needed it.

After my son was born prematurely in 2009, I spent years dealing with anxiety and panic attacks. And as I began working through that trauma, something unexpected happened:

All the ways I'd learned to survive my childhood started becoming impossible to ignore.

I've been the person who could explain the pattern & couldn't stop living it.

That's the person I built this work for.

The hyper-independence. The anxiety. The overfunctioning. The ways I'd learned to manage everything myself because relying on other people had never felt particularly safe.

I could understand where those patterns came from.

But understanding them wasn't changing what happened inside of me.

That's ultimately what brought me to somatic work—and why the work I do now goes beyond simply talking about what happened.

Understanding the pattern is one thing.

Not having to live inside it anymore is another.

THE BEST PLACE TO START

3Video Sessions Package

$395

Three private 60-minute sessions with me

Enough space to identify the pattern, work with what's underneath it and begin practicing a different response

Somatic Experiencing + trauma-informed coaching personalized to you

Email support for follow-up questions between sessions

Use weekly or every other week · 180 days to complete

START WITH 3 SESSIONS

You don't need another decade of understanding why you do this.….

You already know a lot about what happened.

Maybe you've read the books. Followed the accounts. Gone to therapy. Journaled. Set the boundary and then spent three hours wondering if you were a terrible person for setting it.

The next step isn't learning more about your parents.

It's helping you stop living by the rules you learned around them.

You can have the hard conversation without losing yourself.

You can let someone be disappointed without rushing to fix it.

You can say no without needing twelve paragraphs to explain why.

You can feel close to someone without constantly scanning for the moment it disappears.

That's the work.

The Pattern Breaking Sessions

You understand the pattern.

You understand the pattern. Your body still reacts.